90-year-old man

A 90-year-old man was having his annual checkup. The doctor
asked him how he was feeling.

"I've never been better," the old man replied. "I've got an
eighteen-year-old bride who's pregnant & delivered a child.

What is your opinion about that, Doc?" the old man asked.

The doctor thought for a moment, then said,
"Well, let me tell you a story.
I know a guy who is a hunter. He never misses a season for
hunting.But, one day he's in a bit of a hurry and he
accidentally grabs his umbrella instead of his gun.
The doctor continued, "So he's walking in the woods near
a creek, and suddenly he spots a lion in some brush in front
of him. He raises up his umbrella, points it at the lion and
squeezes the handle.
BAM! The lion drops dead in front of him."

"That's impossible!" said the old man in disbelief. Someone
else must have shot that lion."


"Exactly"... Said the Doc

Best Wishes For 2007

May your good health be confirmed by your dentist, gastro-endocrinologist,
urologist, gynaecologist, psychologist, optician, fortune-teller,
and may your physiotherapist, chiropractor, therapist,
Witch-doctor and your slimming clinic tell you
that you don't have to come anymore.
May your doctor know where to start
and may your masseuse know where to stop.
May your salary, your housing subsidy,
the contents of your house and all your shares increase in value,
and may your blood pressure, weight, house loan,
tax and cholesterol all decrease.
May all your friends remember you and
may the taxman forget you exist.
May hijackers, car thieves and rapists overlook you and may your
loved ones always see you.
May your walls be too high for the neighbourhood's thieves
but low enough for you to hop over when you have forgotten your keys.
May you have an honest government
and a dishonest beauty therapist.
May you have an intelligent President
and a fool for a TV license checker.
Lastly may the brewery never close their doors
Merry Christmas and a Happy NEW
YEAR